Recently my modem stopped working. One day it was fine, the next day, not a gig out of it. Just like that. I was really busy and I needed the modem to be working so I rang Technical Support. Yes, I had already tried turning it off and on again. Yes, it was plugged in. (Seriously?) Yes, it was getting power but no wifi buttons were lit up. So here we are, in the 21st century, and yer man tells me to get a paper clip. Which I did. Now, he says, straighten the paper clip and stick it into that tiny hole on the back, with the modem plugged in, and look at the front to see what lights are lighting up. I tried. There I was, on my hands and knees on the floor, and Sid, a large black furry creature from the black lagoon of fur, decides it is time to Love Bomb Mammy.
This involves him getting very vocal, very excited and demanding attention by getting in my face. In this situation, he got in between me and the modem. All I could see was black fur. I ducked and dived, trying to follow the instructions Tech Man issued from the mobile on speaker, while Sid roared and whirled in and out, clearly enjoying this new game with Mammy. Eventually, I was able to seize Sid with one hand (no mean feat as he weighs eleven pounds) and tell Tech Man that no lights whatsover had lit up, while the sweat rolled off me from the heat of Sid’s fur. He agreed to send out a new modem and the minute the call finished, Sid decided that his Crazy for Love session was over and lay down for a snooze. I had to lie down for a snooze too in a darkened room for half an hour to recover. The next time I encounter technical difficulties I am going to do myself a big favour and make sure the house is a cat-free zone. š